Empty or spacious?

Perspectives are our reality. The way we view a situation is how it feels to us. You know – the old half-full or half-empty thing. So what is the difference between something being empty or spacious? In both cases, I translate that into something not being full. I’ve been in homes where every possible space in a room was taken up. We’ve all seen empty rooms. Neither of those seems spacious to me.

Calendar space

The same can be true with time. I’ve had days with nothing scheduled, and when they weren’t blocked off intentionally, those felt empty. Days with a balance of appointments and time in between feel more spacious to me.

What’s the difference?

Everyone has their own definition of words. One of the big differences to me between these two is that “empty” feels like something is missing – it’s got a negative or sad connotation. “Spacious” on the other hand feels full of possibility and makes me happy and curious about what that will invite or allow.

Alone vs. lonely

You can look at your life the same way. Some people feel lonely, whether they live alone or with others. I guess that is usually when they don’t see a purpose or get fulfillment in how they spend their time. Others, even when they live by themselves, seldom seem to be lonely – they appreciate the freedom and space they have to fill their lives in ways that they choose.

The impact of crowding

One of my priorities this year has been to create spaciousness. My experience of having mold remediation and the subsequent home restoration that lasted almost eleven months inspired this priority. My physical space was reduced and cluttered because of the items that had to be moved out of the impacted areas. My schedule was impacted because it had to accommodate both my plans and the comings and goings of the various contractors. My mind was impacted because a lot of my thoughts were focused on how to deal with the space and time issues.

Spaciousness allows for freedom

Freedom and spaciousness are closely connected for me. Spaciousness in a room allows me the freedom to move things around or possibly add something new. Spaciousness in my schedule gives me time to create thoughts or experiences or connections and to be flexible when something unplanned comes up.

No wiggle room leads to stress

When you don’t feel that freedom, it can stress you out! If nothing more fits, when everything is full to the max, trying to fit one more thing in can take effort that you would rather be spending on something else. You have to say no, or rearrange, or reprioritize.

Uncomfortable choices

If those choices are uncomfortable for you (as they are for many people), you not only lose the thing that doesn’t fit, you lose time and energy deciding what won’t fit. This is even harder when you aren’t confident making the decision or your priorities aren’t clear or you have weak boundaries that result in you letting other peoples’ priorities overrule your own.

What about you?

How are you feeling about your life right now? Do you need to change some beliefs so that you can create spaciousness and possibility? What would it feel like to perceive and appreciate that freedom? I can help! Book a session here and let’s get started.